Day 170 — Writing Task 2: Native Speaker Writing の文体分析(2)— 語彙は「珍しさ」ではなく「ぴったりさ」

2026-10-05 Phase 4 — Band 7.0 目標 Writing Task 2(月曜) 語彙6観点 | Free Public Transport(Discuss both views) | 15分 + 40分 + 10分

背景知識

今期 WT2 テーマ2回目 — Phase 4 #7 Native speaker writing の文体分析(語彙面)

Day 163 は構造(文頭のつなぎ言葉・旧→新・文の長さ)を扱い、飾りは真似しないと書きました。今日はその保留していた語彙の側です。問いは1つ: 難しい単語を増やせば Lexical Resource(LR)は上がるのか?

公式の Band Descriptors(Task 2・LR 列の原文)

BandLexical Resource(原文)意味
9"A wide range of vocabulary is used accurately and appropriately with very natural and sophisticated control of lexical features."正確・適切でとても自然
8"There is skilful use of uncommon and/or idiomatic items when appropriate, despite occasional inaccuracies in word choice and collocation."珍しい語はふさわしい場面で
7"There is some ability to use less common and/or idiomatic items. An awareness of style and collocation is evident, though inappropriacies occur."文体と連語への意識
6"If the writer is a risk-taker, there will be a wider range of vocabulary used but higher degrees of inaccuracy or inappropriacy."背伸びすると誤りも増える

出所: IELTS Writing Band Descriptors(Updated May 2023), ielts.org/cdn/ielts-guides/ielts-writing-band-descriptors.pdf(参照日 2026-10-05。PDF を取得しテキスト抽出して Task 2 LR 列を原文照合)

珍しい語は条件つき(when appropriate)で評価されるのであって、数で評価されるのではありません。

今日扱う6つの観点(語彙版)

#観点学習者に多い形上手な書き手の形基準
1連語(collocation)make traffic better / disburse an expenditurecongestion eases / incur costsLR
2あいまい語を具体語へa big problem, a lot of money, poor peoplecongestion, fare revenue, low-paid workersLR・TR
3珍しい語は「話題の語」だけplethora, myriad, paramountridership, peak hours, means-testedLR
4用語は言い換えないfare → fee → charge → costfare は fare のままCC・LR
5文体(register)をそろえるkids / get と epoch / omnibus が混在新聞の論説の高さで一定LR
6辞書の第1訳語を疑うfree → gratuitousfree of charge / fare-freeLR

観点4は H. W. Fowler『A Dictionary of Modern English Usage』(1926)が "elegant variation" と名づけて戒めたもの。議論の中心の用語を言い換えると、読み手は「別のものの話になったのか」と迷います。言い換えてよいのは周辺の一般語だけです。

測った結果: 単語の「珍しさ」と上手さは一致しない

wordfreq(Robyn Speer の OSS。Zipf 頻度: 7前後=the・is、3以下=かなり珍しい)で3つの段落とモデル解答を測定(実測、2026-10-05)。バーは平均 Zipf(短いほど珍しい語が多い)。

段落Zipf 3.5 未満の語あいまい語明らかな語の誤り
L 素朴型(Band 5.5〜6.0)0100
T 背伸び型(risk-taker)1907
N 上手な書き手型300
モデル解答(312語)600
意外だった結果: plethora(3.24)より ridership(2.68)や subsidise(2.36)の方が珍しい。珍しさでは上手な語と見せびらかしの語を区別できない。区別できるのは話題に結びついた語か、どの作文にも差し込める飾りか。
T の珍しい語:
モデル解答の珍しい語:
結論: N の力は珍しい語ではなく、ありふれた語の組み合わせ(連語)から来ている — abolish fares / a modest ticket price / tilt the choice towards / fare revenue / general taxation / peak hours。

Part A — 語彙の文体分析(15分)

あいまい語語・連語の誤り話題の語連語
段落 L(素朴型)
Nowadays, transport is a very big problem in many cities. A lot of people use cars, so there is a lot of traffic and pollution. If buses and trains are free, more people will use them and the traffic will become better. Also, poor people can save a lot of money. However, the government has to pay a lot of money for this, so it is a difficult problem.
段落 T(辞書で背伸び型)
In the contemporary epoch, transportation constitutes a paramount predicament for a plethora of metropolises. A myriad of individuals utilise automobiles, which engenders substantial vehicular commotion and contamination. Should omnibuses and locomotives be gratuitous, commuters would embrace them and congestion would be ameliorated. Furthermore, impoverished citizens could economise a considerable sum. Nevertheless, the administration must disburse an enormous expenditure, rendering this a formidable conundrum.
段落 N(上手な書き手型)
The case for abolishing fares is strongest when it is framed as a congestion policy rather than a gift to passengers. A fare is paid at the moment a driver decides how to travel, whereas the cost of the car itself has already been paid, so even a modest ticket price tilts the choice towards driving. Remove it and some drivers switch. Luxembourg did exactly this in 2020, becoming the first country to make all its buses, trams and trains free to use. Yet fare revenue does not simply disappear. It has to be replaced from general taxation, and on routes that are already crowded at peak hours the same money might buy more capacity than it buys passengers.

正解したら「正解だった」に印を: 0 / 6


Part B — エッセイ(40分)

制限時間 40分250語以上(目標 270〜300語)

40:00

Some people believe that public transport in cities should be free for all passengers and paid for through taxation. Others think that passengers should pay for the journeys they make.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Write at least 250 words.

今日の書き方の条件

  1. あいまい語 0(a lot of / very / big / good / bad / problem / thing / better)
  2. 話題の語(下のリスト①)を5種類以上
  3. 持ち運べる飾り(plethora / myriad / paramount / conundrum / utilise ...)は0
  4. 中心の用語(fare)は言い換えない
  5. 事実は下の表からだけ使う
使ってよい事実出所確認
ルクセンブルクは 2020年2月29日、国内の公共交通をすべて無料にした最初の国Wikipedia "Free public transport"(2026-10-05)二次資料経由・本文を確認
タリンは 2013年、住民投票の後に無料化同上「住民のみ」の条件は未確認 → 書かない
ハッセルトは 1997年に運賃廃止、2006年までに利用者が最大「13倍」同上2014年の運賃再導入は未確認 → 使わない
増えた乗客の多くは徒歩・自転車からの移行だったという評価(タリン)出題者の記憶(Cats ほか 2017)未確認 → 数字なし・可能性の形だけ

構成ガイド

Introduction(60〜75語)
政策の性質を1文 → 2つの見方の言い換え → 立場(条件つきでのみ無料化は正当)
冒頭を "Nowadays, transport is a big problem" にしない
Body 1 — 無料派(90〜110語)
渋滞(運賃は選ぶ瞬間に払う費用)→ 公平(低所得層ほど負担が重い)→ ルクセンブルク 2020
congestion / modest ticket price / low-paid workers
Body 2 — 有料派(90〜110語)
運賃収入は一般税で埋める → 新しい乗客は車から来るとは限らない → 混雑路線では本数を増やす方が効く
fare revenue / general taxation / peak hours / frequency and reliability
Conclusion(45〜60語)
多くの都市では有料維持、対象を絞った無料化は正当
Intro と同じ立場。新しい論点を出さない
Discuss both views の注意: Body 1 を「反論されるための藁人形」にしない。両論を同じ重さで書き、自分の意見は Intro と Conclusion で同じ形に。

有用な表現・語彙

① 話題の語リスト(珍しくても使ってよい語)

語彙意味使用例

② あいまい語の置き換え

あいまい語置き換え
a big problemcongestion / a strain on public finances / overcrowding
a lot of moneya substantial sum / a significant share of the budget / fare revenue
poor peoplelow-income households / low-paid workers
the traffic will become bettercongestion eases / some drivers switch
good for the environmentreduces emissions / cuts car use
difficult problema genuine trade-off

③ 正しい連語(T の誤りの裏返し)

誤り(T)正しい連語種類
vehicular commotiontraffic congestion / heavy traffic形容詞+名詞
disburse an enormous expenditureincur substantial costs / spend a great deal動詞+名詞
economise a considerable sumsave a considerable sum(economise on fuel)語法
congestion would be amelioratedcongestion would ease主語+動詞
contamination(air) pollution語の選択

ヒント

「無料にすべきか」は「何のために」で答えが変わります。目的(渋滞を減らす/低所得者を助ける)ごとに、無料化が一番安い手段かを考えると両論を同じ重さで書けます。

  • 無料派: 運賃は乗るたびに目の前で払う費用/運賃は逆進的(regressive)/ルクセンブルク 2020
  • 有料派: 運賃収入は一般税で埋める(使わない人も払う)/新しい乗客は徒歩・自転車から来る可能性/混雑路線では本数・定時性を買う方が効く
  • 意見: 多くの都市では有料維持。means-tested な割引や車通勤と競う路線での無料化は正当
  • Intro: Abolishing fares ... sounds both generous and green ... → Some argue ..., while others ... → In my view, free travel is justified only where ...
  • Body 1: Supporters make two main arguments. The first concerns congestion. ... Remove it and some drivers switch. The second concerns fairness: ...
  • Body 2: Opponents point out that fare revenue does not simply disappear; ... More importantly, ...
  • Concl: Overall, ... continue to pay in most cities, but targeted free travel ... can be justified.

モデル解答(Band 7.5〜8.0相当・312語)

話題の語連語Zipf 3.5 未満の語

Introduction
Abolishing bus and train fares is one of the few transport policies that sounds both generous and green, which partly explains its appeal. Some argue that cities should fund their networks entirely through taxation, while others believe that those who travel should pay for their journeys. In my view, free travel is justified only where it is targeted at reducing car use and is matched by investment in capacity.

Body 1
Supporters make two main arguments. The first concerns congestion. A fare is paid at the moment a driver decides how to travel, whereas the cost of the car itself has already been paid, so even a modest ticket price tilts the choice towards driving. Remove it and some drivers switch. The second concerns fairness: fares absorb a larger share of the income of low-paid workers, who are also the most dependent on buses. Luxembourg became the first country to make all its public transport free in 2020, which shows that the policy is administratively workable.

Body 2
Opponents point out that fare revenue does not simply disappear; it must be replaced from general taxation, including taxes paid by people who rarely use the network. More importantly, a free service may attract many passengers who previously walked or cycled rather than drove, in which case the environmental gain is small. On routes that are already crowded at peak hours, the same money would arguably achieve more if it were spent on frequency and reliability, since a free train that is too full to board is of little use to anyone.

Conclusion
Overall, I believe that passengers should continue to pay in most cities, but that targeted free travel, for example for low-income residents or on routes that compete directly with commuting by car, can be justified. The decision should rest on what a city is trying to achieve rather than on the appeal of the word "free".

312語(空白区切りの実測)。段落別 69 / 95 / 92 / 56。

モデル解答の解説

指標モデル解答今日の条件
Zipf 3.5 未満の語6(すべて話題の語)—
持ち運べる飾り00
あいまい語00
話題の語の種類(手で数えた)95以上
fare / fares の回数4(言い換え 0)言い換えない

連語の一覧

連語型素朴に書くと
abolish fares動詞+名詞make transport free
fund their networks through taxation動詞+名詞+前置詞句the government pays
tilt the choice towards driving動詞+名詞+前置詞people choose cars
fares absorb a larger share of the income主語+動詞+名詞poor people pay a lot
administratively workable副詞+形容詞possible
fare revenue does not simply disappear名詞+名詞+動詞money is lost
the environmental gain is small形容詞+名詞not so good for nature

左列の語のほとんどは中学・高校で習う語。珍しいのは組み合わせの方です。これが Band 9 の "very natural and sophisticated control of lexical features" の中身です。

4基準(私の判定・公式採点ではない)

基準推定根拠
TR7.5両論を同じ重さ(95語・92語)、立場が Intro・Conclusion で一致。Body 2 の「徒歩・自転車からの移行」に例・数字がない
CC8.0"two main arguments. The first... The second..." で地図を先に示す。文頭つなぎは More importantly と Overall の2つ
LR8.0話題の語9種類を言い換えずに使う。珍しい語6つはすべて話題の語。"tilts" はやや比喩的(不安なら makes driving more attractive)
GRA8.0whereas / in which case / if it were spent / 命令文+and の条件
(7.5 + 8.0 + 8.0 + 8.0) / 4 = 7.875 → Overall 8.0

語彙スキャン(Part B・C で自分の答案を数える)

1〜4 を自動で数えます(目安は今日の4つの文章から出した仮の値で、採点官の基準ではありません)。5(自信のない珍しい語)と6(連語の実在確認)は手で。

よくある日本人のミス

ミス原因正しい書き方
Transportation fee is expensive.料金=fee と覚えているFares are high.(乗り物は fare、入場・授業は fee)
The traffic will become better.「よくなる」の直訳Congestion will ease.
Poor people can save a lot of money.主語が「人」、量が「たくさん」Fares absorb a larger share of low-paid workers' income.
many merits and demerits日本語の「メリット・デメリット」advantages and disadvantages / benefits and costs
It is paramount / a plethora of を毎回入れる難しい語=高得点と教わる話題の語(congestion, fare revenue)に置き換える
fare → fee → charge → price と毎回変える繰り返しは減点と教わる中心の用語は繰り返す

この回の設計記録・扱わなかった範囲

迷った案採らなかった理由前提が変わったら
Band 8/9 段落を Day 163 の構造6観点で分解して書き直す構造は Day 163・169 で2回続けた。今期を構造だけで終えると、保留した語彙面が残るDay 177 で構造+語彙の統合版
語彙の上手さを平均 Zipf で測る測ったら背伸び型 T(4.86)が一番「上手」に見え、評価と逆になった。指標から外し、話題の語か飾りかの分類に替えた機械化するなら話題ごとの語リストが要る(今は交通・財政のみ)
AWL(Coxhead 2000)の割合で測るAWL は「学術文に多い語」で、LR の「適切さ」とは別。連語の上手さは測れない語彙量を増やす段階なら有効
題材を環境にするDay 164・167 で環境・エネルギーを使った—
  • 扱わなかった: 慣用句(idioms。Band 7 目標では危険が大きい)、語形成の誤り(Vocab の日へ)、米英の語彙差(ridership は米、英では passenger numbers)
  • wordfreq の限界: ハイフン語(means-tested)は正しく測れない。Zipf は話し言葉・ウェブを含む混合コーパスの頻度

次のステップ

  • 発展: 自分の答案の動詞+名詞を3つ選び、Oxford Collocations Dictionary(ozdic.com)で実在を確かめる
  • 発展2: Day 163 の自分のエッセイをこのスキャンで数え直す
  • 次回予告(火曜 Day 171): Reading 模試形式(Matching Headings+Multiple Choice+Short Answer)

自己評価

データはこのブラウザにだけ保存されます。

Part A: /6 語数: 時間(分):
Part C あいまい語: → 話題の語: → 連語の実在確認: /3
TR
CC
LR
GRA

自分の回答(エッセイ全文): 0語

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